Left Out? Let’s Make Our Own Party (And Maybe a Cool Side Quest)

You ever scroll past a photo of people having a great time and think, Wait… was I supposed to be invited to that? Yeah. Kids feel it too—except instead of awkward Instagram FOMO, it’s “Why wasn’t I picked for the kickball team?” or “Why is everyone playing Minecraft together except me?”

Exclusion stinks. But instead of dwelling on it (or plotting revenge via an overly elaborate group text—tempting, but no), here’s how to help your kid and yourself move past it.

1. Say the Thing

“Yeah, that really stinks.” That’s it. No fixing, no forced positivity. Just acknowledging that being left out doesn’t feel great. Sometimes, people just want to be heard before moving on.

2. Remember, It’s Not Always Personal

Your kid wasn’t invited to the sleepover? Maybe the other kid was only allowed to have two people over. You weren’t included in the group outing? Maybe it was a last-minute plan and not a secret mission to exclude you. Not every exclusion is a conspiracy. Sometimes it’s logistics. Sometimes it’s just people being people.

3. Make Your Own Plans (Better Ones!)

Got left out? Fine. Make something cooler happen. No invite to the Minecraft server? Create your own (with a giant floating castle, because why not?). No seat at the lunch table? Find a new spot and invite someone else who looks a little lost. Someone else’s trip didn’t include you? Plan an even better one—maybe with a weird roadside attraction and a spontaneous detour.

4. Find Your People (or Birds, If Necessary)

If a group keeps leaving you or your kid out, maybe they aren’t your people. And that’s okay! Go find the ones who do want you around. Whether it’s a new gaming friend, a fellow road trip enthusiast, or an overly friendly crow at a campsite (hey, some birds really get us), there’s always another connection to make.

5. Laugh, Learn, and Move On

Someday, you and your kid will look back and say, Remember when we thought that was such a big deal? Maybe it’ll even turn into a funny story. Until then, keep doing what you love, keep inviting joy into your life, and don’t waste time worrying about doors that didn’t open.

Because the best moments? They’re the ones you create yourself.